Have you ever woken up, looked in the mirror, and became embarrassed by what you saw? This is how I felt in middle and high school; I hated the way I looked and would have given anything besides a trip to the gym to be stick thin. I never thought of myself as attractive and even though I can barely finish a meal I still felt like I ate too much. I never developed an eating disorder but I just never thought of myself as attractive, especially when I ate food.
Kara Jackson definitely explained that feeling of forcing yourself to camouflage with society when you force your bowl-shaped stomach into a pair of skinny jeans aka a "fashionable prison". I always thought I looked my best when I felt pain while wearing tight pants because it gave that illusion of perfection. When I reflect on some of the other silly measures I would go to feel skinny and pretty, I realized that none of it really mattered nor shaped who I am today.
Like Jackson, I was always thinking about how my body would be seen by others as I went outside, and not just my form but the way my natural hair is styled too. If my hair was not straight then I didn't feel attractive nor a valid member of society. I wish the old me could have the same mindset that I have now and be informed that the way I look and dress myself is no one's worry but mine, and that if society won't accept then I should not camouflage myself to conform to their likings. A quote by Jackson that really stuck out to me because of its truth and relatability is “I think that black women are often left out of those conversations about our bodies, maybe because of the way our bodies are idolized, but they’re not idolized on us. They’re not idolized with our skins.” I feel like many black women attempt to express this concept to others, but not enough people are willing to listen. For example, our usually curvy body types open a door for us to become objectified and sexualized beginning at young ages, and when we wear clothes that emphasize our form in the slightest, we are viewed as “hoes” and “ratchet”. Then when a white woman gets surgery done to look like us she is glorified and “can do whatever she wants with her body”. That may not be the best example to express my point but another one would be how Michelle Obama was constantly criticized on what she wore but the first lady Melania Trump was a model that posed in provocative photos and did not receive as much backlash like Michelle did. A black woman wearing braids in her hair is seen as ghetto and trashy, but when a non-black person wears the same style it is praised and seen as exotic. The list goes on and further reveals how slow our society is moving towards annihilating social discrimination and acceptance.
Kara Jackson definitely explained that feeling of forcing yourself to camouflage with society when you force your bowl-shaped stomach into a pair of skinny jeans aka a "fashionable prison". I always thought I looked my best when I felt pain while wearing tight pants because it gave that illusion of perfection. When I reflect on some of the other silly measures I would go to feel skinny and pretty, I realized that none of it really mattered nor shaped who I am today.
Like Jackson, I was always thinking about how my body would be seen by others as I went outside, and not just my form but the way my natural hair is styled too. If my hair was not straight then I didn't feel attractive nor a valid member of society. I wish the old me could have the same mindset that I have now and be informed that the way I look and dress myself is no one's worry but mine, and that if society won't accept then I should not camouflage myself to conform to their likings. A quote by Jackson that really stuck out to me because of its truth and relatability is “I think that black women are often left out of those conversations about our bodies, maybe because of the way our bodies are idolized, but they’re not idolized on us. They’re not idolized with our skins.” I feel like many black women attempt to express this concept to others, but not enough people are willing to listen. For example, our usually curvy body types open a door for us to become objectified and sexualized beginning at young ages, and when we wear clothes that emphasize our form in the slightest, we are viewed as “hoes” and “ratchet”. Then when a white woman gets surgery done to look like us she is glorified and “can do whatever she wants with her body”. That may not be the best example to express my point but another one would be how Michelle Obama was constantly criticized on what she wore but the first lady Melania Trump was a model that posed in provocative photos and did not receive as much backlash like Michelle did. A black woman wearing braids in her hair is seen as ghetto and trashy, but when a non-black person wears the same style it is praised and seen as exotic. The list goes on and further reveals how slow our society is moving towards annihilating social discrimination and acceptance.
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