Blog #5

This rap was inspired by Danez Smith’s Dinosaurs in the Hood

Dinosaurs in the hood, they aint up to no good

Hunting the streets, looking for fresh meat

Come on top of your car, take you right out of your seat

No your gonna be the dinosaur’s feast

They terrorize the streets, they don’t care what your think

They will take you and eat you in the time it takes to blink

They don’t care for your color, black, brown yellow, or pink

And with what is left they’ll spit you out in the sink

Dinosaurs in the hood looking for dinner

With every round they make our numbers get slimmer

Hopefully they only took the sinners

Since there can be only one winner                    

Dinosaurs in the hood, they aint up to no good

It is time for us to test our manhood

Time to dig deep and test our strength

We have to win the battle no matter the length

Grandma’s on the porch doing their part

This war is a battle and will become art

With all we got we can win the fight

We’ll be ready to go day or night

If we dream it, we can believe it

Then this fight will be won

It will take all of us together, not just one

And in the end, the only thing that will come up is the sun.

Blog 4/8

Today our world is living in crisis. People say the phrase “everyday is a new day and a chance to start over”, but these days it’s not. Everyday the news channels broadcast the number of new cases in deaths in just our state alone. Everyday more and more people are dying due to this terrible disease that we cannot stop. Everyday, nurses and doctors are putting themselves and their families at risk as they go to work to help save lives. People are losing hope and faith that this will ever end because at this rate, it only looks like it’s going to get worse.
The poem called “The Church of Michael Jordan” takes a simple topic, basketball, and adds in a religious element to shift the entire meaning of the poem. Throughout the poem, the speaker sees various aspects of his sport as religious elements. The very beginning he says how he sees that his basketball is an orange prayer, and the hoop is the arms of God. These little details that the author adds to the story add this element of wonder as the author believes that prayer and faith can be found in our everyday lives.
Having reminders in our daily life that there is faith and hope for our future is imperative in our world today. This poem by Jeffrey McDaniel offers us this outlook that prayer and faith can be found in everything we do in our daily lives. We simply have to believe in the hope that is to come, and look for the chance of prayer and the good in each day.

Blog #4

Jaime Hynes

The poem “The Church of Michael Jordan” by Jeffery McDaniel makes the game of basketball into a metaphor for the Church and for faith according to the author. He compares the hoop to God’s outstretched arms and says the ball is an “orange prayer” that he is offering to God. All of the players playing defense on the author serve as temptations and obstacles “between me and the Lord’s light.” McDaniel continues to judge the way priests look for public affirmation and do not focus their attention on “leading with their feet” and “teaching by example”, much like Jesus once did. Then, at the end of the poem, the author describes the shot into the basket and how the Lord’s truth is visible to the audience, who will swear they witnessed a miracle. He also mentions that this shot converts the nonbelievers, who also take form as the opposing team playing defense.

This elaborate metaphor for faith offers a clear image of the intensity and suspense of a basketball game and how difficult it is for players to make a shot into the hoop with all of the distractions in their way. This metaphor can be relatable for the reader no matter what their faith might be because the craziness of life will always serve as an obstacle or temptation, as McDaniel describes it. This metaphor also supports his claim that priests should “work in disguise” rather than look for public affirmation because he describes God and prayer in a very everyday situation, a basketball game. He shows that he is using his actions, not words, to pursue and further his faith. Through his actions, he claims the “Lord’s truth” is visible and the audience and players who may be nonbelievers will be moved to convert and start to believe.

Reading this poem at this point in my life is interesting because we are currently in the middle of Holy Week, but also in the middle of a pandemic and possibly one of the deathliest weeks of that pandemic. There is a sort of depressing irony in these two events occurring at the same time and many faithful people might be questioning why this is happening. The answer to this question, like many questions people have during this time, is very unclear. However, this poem reminded me of what is most important about any faith, which is to lead by example and use your actions to live out your faith. This concept has been so relevant in our world today as we see health care workers putting their health and the health of their loved ones at risk, in order to help patients and our country and world at large. I always get upset watching the interviews and videos of these people working so hard to fight what seems like a never-ending battle.

Not only are the health care workers a perfect example of expressing faith through action, but it is also visible in the actions of ordinary people doing extraordinary things to help out during this time. For example, my uncle has been supporting local businesses and buying food for the workers at multiple different hospitals and health centers. His generosity during this stressful time is inspiring to me and hopefully to others who see or are impacted by his actions. Another example I’ve seen is the many people who are working to make masks for hospitals and health care centers that are running low on supplies. My mom is a second-grade teacher and one of her students just learned to sew, so she has been actively making masks and donating them. Another example I’ve experienced is the surprise drive-by birthday party my dad and I planned for my mom’s 50^th this past Saturday. The love she felt from all of her new friends, old friends, family, colleagues, and even her students that drove by that day to simply say happy birthday was incredible. It’s truly a moment I will never forget, and I’m sure she won’t forget it either. During this difficult time, it is extremely important that everyone does their part by not only following the rules of social distancing but making sure that everyone is doing okay and feels supported and loved.

Blog 4/8

This current time in everyone's lives is one that most of us probably never imagined we would experience in our lifetime. At the beginning of my time spent in quarantine, I had yet to allow the reality of the situation to truly sinks in. However, once about a week went by and the news on the television began to worsen, I felt the stress and anxiety rush over me, all at once. When we talked about The Fourth Sense of Matter by Jo Ann Beard, in class, some points from the discussion and Dr. Ellis truly resonated with me and our current circumstances. The story written by Jo Ann Beard reflects upon the devastating shooting that occurred at the University of Iowa in 1991. Beard was a colleague of the victims in the shooting, as well as good friends with a few of them. This a significant and traumatic event in her life that led her to reflect and address everything she knows. At first, when she hears of the shooting, she is in denial and shock. The end of the story shows her initial processing of grief and pain. In our discussion, we concluded that her main purpose for writing this piece was so that she could show others that you do not know what you have until it is gone. She wants her readers to know that you need to appreciate what you have and find a way to be grateful for that, every single day. Although this situation she writes about is different than what the world is currently facing, the same message is valid. We are all in a position where it feels like life has stopped. We are missing what we had before everything was frozen in time. For myself and my friends, we lost our first year of college. So many people are out of work. Many people are completely alone and isolated. We know want things that, before, we found irritating or not worthy of our time. Not only that, but the reason that we must lose all of these things is that the outside world, right now, is dangerous. It is all very scary and uncertain. So, it is important that we remember the good things in our lives and not take them for granted anymore when this is all over.

Bars 4/8

I’m sleep in the house

I’m sleep in the house sleepin

Rona got me in the house wheepin

Can we find a cure so we can start competin 

We can’t see our friends for a bit 

Leaving grandma just to knit 

While everyone has a fit and is just gonna quit

Feeling lonely just give them a call

Until you realize you were on pause all along 

Getting out of bed was tough your not wrong 

I know right, it’s been so so long 

Staying in the house is oh so limiting 

Been sitting around to find shows that are interesting

Where walls are thin and everyone is listening

Feeling numb to all this social distancing

Because I’m sleep in the house

I’m sleep in the house sleepin

Camouflage Blog 4/8

Have you ever woken up, looked in the mirror, and became embarrassed by what you saw? This is how I felt in middle and high school; I hated the way I looked and would have given anything besides a trip to the gym to be stick thin. I never thought of myself as attractive and even though I can barely finish a meal I still felt like I ate too much. I never developed an eating disorder but I just never thought of myself as attractive, especially when I ate food.
Kara Jackson definitely explained that feeling of forcing yourself to camouflage with society when you force your bowl-shaped stomach into a pair of skinny jeans aka a "fashionable prison".  I always thought I looked my best when I felt pain while wearing tight pants because it gave that illusion of perfection. When I reflect on some of the other silly measures I would go to feel skinny and pretty, I realized that none of it really mattered nor shaped who I am today.
Like Jackson, I was always thinking about how my body would be seen by others as I went outside, and not just my form but the way my natural hair is styled too. If my hair was not straight then I didn't feel attractive nor a valid member of society. I wish the old me could have the same mindset that I have now and be informed that the way I look and dress myself is no one's worry but mine, and that if society won't accept then I should not camouflage myself to conform to their likings. A quote by Jackson that really stuck out to me because of its truth and relatability is “I think that black women are often left out of those conversations about our bodies, maybe because of the way our bodies are idolized, but they’re not idolized on us. They’re not idolized with our skins.” I feel like many black women attempt to express this concept to others, but not enough people are willing to listen. For example, our usually curvy body types open a door for us to become objectified and sexualized beginning at young ages, and when we wear clothes that emphasize our form in the slightest, we are viewed as “hoes” and “ratchet”. Then when a white woman gets surgery done to look like us she is glorified and “can do whatever she wants with her body”. That may not be the best example to express my point but another one would be how Michelle Obama was constantly criticized on what she wore but the first lady Melania Trump was a model that posed in provocative photos and did not receive as much backlash like Michelle did. A black woman wearing braids in her hair is seen as ghetto and trashy, but when a non-black person wears the same style it is praised and seen as exotic.  The list goes on and further reveals how slow our society is moving towards annihilating social discrimination and acceptance.

Blog Post 4/8

Cordy Albanese
Dr. Ellis
ENG-101
8 April 2020
                                                                       Blog Post 

              As I continue my new lifestyle in quarantine I have started to pick up new habits. These habits are ones I consider to be beneficial for my well-being and have made me challenge the person I was before. It has been a tough adjustment going from constant social interaction to just seeing immediate family 24/7. So I have decided that I can either dwell on the negatives of this situation or I can realize that it is an opportunity to self-serve and focus on my mental and physical health. I loved every minute of my service learning at the Bridges Program and I hope I taught the students there a thing or two, but two kinds of growth can come from service to others, and service to yourself. This quarantine has given me the time and comfort that I did not have back at school, and as hard as it is sometimes I feel better when I have the opportunity to just stay home. I do not have to feel the guilt of declining plans or feel the pressure to be doing something extravagant with my time. I have my whole life ahead of me and this may be the only socially acceptable time to focus on just me. Sometimes life can be so crazy when it comes to putting others before yourself and constantly moving around that you forget what it’s like to just live for yourself and do the little things that you enjoy. One thing I picked up recently that I had a hard time finding time or motivation for is working out. I find myself happier and having a clearer mind after I work out. I sleep better and feel better about myself. After watching the video on Kara Jackson’s poem it opened my thoughts up about myself and how I view myself as a woman. She talks about the struggles she as an African American woman faces. I will never understand those struggles or what she goes through daily. I can as a woman understand the challenges that come with social media and the certain “look” that one wants to achieve after scrolling through their Instagram feed. Particularly the lines “Americans love excess but we also love jeans and refuse to make excess comfortable in them”, spoke to me when I think about these challenges. As I spend my time in quarantine trying to see the positives it can be hard when I see things on social media (which I have more time for) of what is “beautiful”. With this being said, I took Kara’s words and realized that although these struggles of inner beauty exist, they do not define me. I am happy with myself and the way I look, even if sometimes I wish to look a different way after seeing a picture. It is up to me to see the good in life and take care of myself the way I have been with physical activity and eating healthy. Putting these two together with healthy thoughts ultimately makes a great mindset for what we are all going through. In life you face many challenges, as an African American woman, Kara faces many more than I will ever have to. She takes these challenges and uses her poetry and her voice to march through and accept whatever may come her way with gratitude. I admire this thought process and hope that my time spent bettering myself over the next few weeks will lead me to a powerful mindset like hers. 

Blog #4

    For this analysis/blog post, I will be discussing the poem Dinosaurs in the Hood by Danez Smith and since current world circumstances don’t allow me to go to an event, I want to connect it with my experience watching American movies.  Danez Smith is clearly irritated by the portrayal of African Americans and other minority groups in the film industry in this country. He discusses how black boys are portrayed with guns and how it foreshadows their ultimate demise. He discusses how Quintin Tarantino would rather give the boy and gun to breed violence instead of a toy. He wants a scene where the black boy is treated as just a boy who wants to play not someone who is looking to harm. I don’t understand the Quentin Tarantino reference here because it is incredibly inaccurate. The author portrays the esteemed director as someone who makes racist roles and movies with black men creating violence. In my opinion, this depiction of the director is completely false and misunderstood. From what I read in the poem Smith doesn’t want Quentin to direct because he thinks he is a racist who will fill the movie with disrespectful stereotypes and actions. If you watch a Quentin Tarantino movie you will see that is far from the case. Samuel L. Jackson (a black man) has made his film career tied heavily to this director (a supposed racist), a weird combination given the circumstances presented by this author. Samuel L. Jackson has been public in his support for his director saying that any black character he has portrayed is far from racist and so is Tarantino. Jackson even says that all of his characters are the smartest, most respected, and most in control out of all the characters in these films, what a weird role to for a racist to write for a black actor. None of these characters are fools in any sort and know what is going on in the world around them, they aren’t being vilified or causing harm unnecessarily.  I think the author of this poem missed that in movies and Hollywood everything and I mean everything in overexaggerated and fake because that’s what makes for a good movie people will pay to watch, not because there are racist undertones with everything. Movies are fake and should be taken as such, they are merely for entertainment purposes and to make money, which should not be confused with the lives and actions of everyday people who may be portrayed in the movie, you have to have the maturity and self-awareness to realize that. The author is yearning for a scene where a young black boy is playing with dinosaur toys with his eyes wide and hopeful and dreaming of his bright future. To this, I would tell him that this is not a good movie scene, but it is a beautiful real-life scene that can and is found in the world today even though he may not realize it. In my opinion, there is nothing your skin color can do to prevent you from doing anything. People aren’t like they used to be and the ones that are proudly proclaimed idiots who you are supposed to disregard. Any dream that a young black boy may have can be achieved if he puts himself on the right path and conducts himself and a respectful and proper manner. If he can deliver the results he wants and he and only he has the power to do so, just the way it should be. That young boy has the opportunity to make out of his life whatever he wants if he is willing to do the work required, work and results have no bearing on skin color, and to believe it does is pretty ridiculous if you ask me.

Blog #3

            For this analysis/blog post, I will be discussing the poem Chameleon by Kiran Waqar and Hawa Adam and my newfound experiences at my job during this current epidemic we are currently living through. With this new Corona Virus disease begging to take the streets of America, it has caused what some would say an unpleasant turn in society. People are stockpiling goods like there is no tomorrow, toilet paper, food, and especially alcohol. This panic has caused business to be almost as high as it would be during the Christmas and New Year’s, but the reason for their alcohol purchases now differ greatly. People walk to the store most of them now wearing masks, gloves and other basic protective gear to fulfill their drinking needs. On the other hand, there are people who buy like they won’t leave their homes for months, walking into the store with a. full makeshift hazmat suit comprised of garbage bags and tape, not the typical look you would expect from any straight-thinking person. My first reaction when seeing people like this is that all of this won’t help you fight what you are trying, it is only making you look like a fool. In the poem the two authors right about how Chameleons have to adapt to their situations and soundings and to do that they change their appearance in order to survive. These people who come to shop dressed like literal garbage are in their minds changing their appearance to survive, but their over-exaggerated protection is in my estimation completely useless compared to that of the chameleon. In a few stanzas down the authors discuss how the how though chameleons have this protective layer, they know “It cannot hide us, It cannot keep us safe”. Even the chameleons know that simply having this protective layering over them will not save them, unlike those who wonder shipping covered from head to toe in plastic bag. Practicing safe and healthy procedures is the best way to combat the enemies we are currently battling with in this world, not useless overprotection. In the next few stanzas they write, “So we develop thick skin so no one can ever see us, So no one can ever know us, Including ourselves”. The useless over protection some people enter with makes them look like they aren’t even a person, you don’t have any idea who they are when they enter only from the sound of their voice would you maybe be able to recognize them. I feel that when these type of people look in the mirror with their getup they themselves don’t even know who they are; they see what this panic has caused them to do and realize that they are so far from what they should be doing that they can’t even see themselves as a normal person in the mirror, that and maybe the fact that they are covered in garbage bags.

iExamen 2

                   In my culture, kindness is not always reflected from the parents to the children; African American and especially African parents raise their children way harsher than how other families may raise their children. I was not exposed to the power of kindness apart from behaving well in school so that I did not have to face severe consequences at home for unruly behavior. This verbal exercise is far different than how I am used to communicating with my family because non-sarcastic and kinder diction is a taboo communication concept in my family.

                    

                  This morning my older sister yelled at me for eating the last pack of gushers. In response, I apologized for doing so (I would NEVER do this) and told her if I had money I would get some more (which is kind of true and not completely a lie). She responded to me by calling me an idiot and if I were not doing the examen I would have said something in rude in return but I did not ( I will tomorrow though!). 

                     

                   I am usually much nicer with my younger sister so I just conducted conversation with her as I normally would while I assisted with her homework packet. I am the same with my mother as well but not so much with my dad because he gets on my last nerve, so I ignored him today. This exercise helped me consider my comments and feelings more towards my family members. It also caused me to reflect on the two sudden deaths of my uncle and aunt and that I should be kinder with my words towards my family because (God forbid) anything can happen and I do not want my last words to be hurtful nor false. 

                   With the virus pandemic lurking about in the states, we are forcing ourselves to come to a closure about what we purchase, what we will eat, how our future will pan out and so many other worries the we forget to appreciate who we have around us; and those with roofs over their heads and food in their house forget that they are far more privileged than those without. The pandemic has caused us to not consider the words nor actions that we use to treat others hence the reason why xenophobia and racism has erupted within our society. Thankfully, people have realized that we overreact to the smallest issues as a result of fear and quelled the confusion with kindness and compassion.

                     Kindness, usefulness, and truth are the remedies for fear and aggression. My older sister often refers to me as "the golden child" because I do not like to quarrel with my parents but I instead use kindness to respond to my parent's constant demands or confusion. It is not easy to be patient with my parents nor my siblings, especially when they are in a bad mood and I try my best not to be an addition to their anger. I feel like a lot of social issues that exist in our society today are fueled by fear and confusion and people just not considering how their words may or may not solve whatever issue they have. Especially on political terms, a lot of arguments erupt from the simplest misconduct of speech. We all need to reconsider our words everyday to quell confusion.

                     

                   

iExamen 2

Jaime Hynes

iExamen 2

Throughout the course of the day on March 17, 2020, also known as Saint Patrick’s Day, I tried to make sure that the messages I communicated were kind, useful, and true. At first, this seemed like a pretty simple task. When reflecting on how I communicate, I felt that the messages I speak or send are usually pretty kind, useful, and truthful. However, after spending six days in quarantine with my family, my words were not always super kind or useful. Considering I have two younger siblings, boy and girl, my patience was constantly being challenged resulting in maybe some not so kind messages being shared.

But on this day, I paid very close attention to the words I used and the messages I shared not only with my family but also with my friends over social media and text messaging. Since the coronavirus has been, of course, a very large discussion between everyone in the world, I tried to make sure every text I sent could be useful to my friends who were struggling in quarantine like I have been. I did this by sending new updates about the virus in our county and in our country but also fact-checking them before pressing send, to ensure my message was truthful. Along with true and factual information, I tried my best to share positivity to my friends who have been very upset with the news of not being able to return to school, vacations being canceled and overall becoming lonely due to social distancing. I did this by reminding them that when this pandemic begins to fade, life will return back to not only be back to normal, but we will be able to appreciate it even more than we did prior to the COVID-19 outbreak. Things like traveling to see family and friends or sitting in your favorite restaurant for a meal will mean so much more.

This day, March 17^th, I also found out some extremely saddening news that greatly affected my day and how I communicated with those around me and my friends through social media. I found out that the day before Nick Myers, a boy in my class at Loyola, passed away. I had the pleasure of spending time with Nick a few times and from what I can remember, he was such a caring person with a lot of positive energy and the best smile. Although, my concern this day was not with my own grieving. I have a few friends who were very close to Nick, and this sudden loss was taking a huge toll on them. Specifically, my one very close friend and Nick hung out almost every day of the first semester and she has gone through other tragic deaths like this in her life. Because of this, reaching out to her and expressing my love for her was my main priority. I wanted her to know that she was in my thoughts and prayers and that I would always be there for her to talk to, even though I knew she was strong enough to get through it herself. This communication, while also useful, was my way of expressing a kind message to a friend in a time of need.

Throughout this day, I chose my words thoughtfully when interacting with my family. With the previously mentioned event in mind, I was feeling especially grateful for each person in my life and wanted to express that. I chose to be extra kind to my siblings and parents because life is short. Going forward with this crazy new life we are all living in, filled with hand sanitizer and keeping six feet apart from everyone we see, I think it is important that we stay positive and help each other through it. This iExamen helped me to realize that the words we use and the messages we communicate play a big role in this positivity and helpfulness and I hope to try and implement what I learned in my communicating going forward.  

iExamen 2

            Practicing self-reflection while home from college due to the coronavirus sparking a worldwide crisis is incredibly fitting. As my family and I quarantine ourselves and disconnect from the social world, observing my attitudes and actions has the potential to be most effective.  I think that by the end of the time I am quarantined with my family, I will have spent the most quality time with them than ever before. It is a good idea to challenge myself to live, at least for a day, with the mindset of only saying things that are kind, useful, and true. When I went into this day and observation, I had hoped to improve the time spent with my family members and to avoid any potential conflicts. It is a difficult adjustment coming home from school, unexpectedly, and living with family again, especially when we cannot leave the house. I started the day by going downstairs to make myself breakfast. I was trying to think of how I could apply to be kinder into my life, in any way, no matter how simple or extreme. I decided to make breakfast for my family and their response was well worth it. It took barely any extra effort or time to do something that would make others happy and that was a great feeling. I think it was especially important that I did something that would make my family happy as this is such a stressful and uncertain time. It made me want to continue to do something every day to make them happy and help to relieve the stress of everything going on.

 Throughout the rest of the day, I worked to make sure that anything I say or act upon is useful and positive intent. In order to accomplish this, I needed to make sure that I thought before I said anything and did not let my emotions get in the way. For example, I was initially disappointed with the fact that I could not see my friends from home and that I was losing the second semester of my freshman year at college. However, after more careful and thoughtful reflection, I realized how lucky I truly am. So many people are going through a much more difficult time than me right now. The only thing that I have control of in this situation is staying in my house and keeping those struggling in my thoughts. It would be useless and selfish to complain about something that does not impact me to the full extent as it does others.

This self-observation reminded me to reconnect with myself and who I truly want to be. I want to be kind and I want to make others feel good. Unfortunately, sometimes emotions get in the way of that goal. After completing this iExamen, I am going to consistently work on being more mindful of my actions and thoughts.

iExamen 2

IExamen 2

For this IExamen, I was told to caution my day using kind, useful, and true words. Although this was challenging considering my generation uses a lot of sarcasm and words they don’t mean, I was certainly up to the challenge. As I went on with my day, I received very different responses that I usually get whether that was people not taking me serious or just ignoring my comment completely. For which I come to understand that I joke around with my friends a lot. As for my family members they tended to smile more often with acceptance of my positivity which shifted my mood to a rather sincere, heartwarming feel. These emotions sometimes feel distant at times because of priorities set forth to ignore the simplistic pleasures of the world. Instead we tend to use ignorance and dishonesty to travel through our lives, but sometimes it’s the kindness out of our hearts that helps us do best. The best response I got was from my mom, when I said something relatively funny and all she had for me was a giggle and a simple “I love you Najee”. From getting through with this task, I felt as if by communicating this way, I gained a sort of acceptance from my peers or possibly them looking at me a different way than before. Its always a what if possibility that shows another side of someone for which positivity should be at the forefront of everyone’s conscious and comments. 

Before taking part of this project, I thought it would be silly to act out of character than I usually do, but since the task was to add positivity in my life turned out to be a good challenge. There are some people that would think it would be easy to do it, but for me staying true, kind, and useful can often go awry when talking to your friends and siblings. The change was much needed to see the response of my people around me. I didn’t think I would be able to do it for a full day, but with intentions and focus I was able to do so. My comments spoke outward to the point where people didn’t take my words serious initially, but with another listen they took note in my sincerety. Being useful and kind to people shouldn’t be hard, but the way I have come to live recently, I just haven’t really payed a lot of attention to detail. I have helped people in the passed like with homework among other things, and kindness just comes out of your heart which I have been raised to do. Before taking on this project, I just don’t quite recall always doing such with no negative vibes in my life. Finally, while doing this project, I had to pay attention to detail and try not to laugh while that would make it seem sarcastic or not genuine. Overall, that was the main thing I had to deal with and learn from every encounter where being genuine was hard to stay true to, but has taught me now that by telling the truth and being kind, there is a will and a way to keep positivity in your life to make sure everyone around you is happy and has a smile on their face.

iExamen 2

Joseph Kamish

Dr. Ellis

En-101-07

17 March 2020

iExamen 2

            After reading the directions for the second iExamen, I though quite a bit about how it so closely resembled the purpose of the first.  Both are strongly centered around self-observation and reflection.  The more I thought about these activities, the more I saw how helpful they could be.  Practicing different types of social interaction and personal behavior can help you find a thought process that really suits you in all situations.  The first iExamen focused purely on self-reflection, while the second iExamen hopes to build off what you learned previously and put it into practice by addressing people with purely kind, useful, and true responses.  Before starting this activity my first thought was that there was no possible way that I could tell everyone something that is true, and kind, in every situation.

            This exercise was very interesting to me because of how I speak to friends and family on a regular basis.  Normally when I’m around my friends, we freely criticize and make fun of each other, as it’s just part of our casual interactions.  So usually, when I’d find myself calling my brother or friend stupid or an idiot (but not actually meaning it), I had to quickly stop myself and just say nothing at all.  The reason I said nothing was because whenever I throw around insults like that, it’s honestly for no purpose at all rather than just to fill the conversations.  Nobody said anything to me but I’m positive that my friends were wondering why I was acting so weird.  This specific example was particularly funny internally to me, because I would constantly find myself in a situation where my brain couldn’t come up with anything in place of the insult to say, so I would just sit there quietly.  For the most part, communicating like these didn’t really help or hinder me in any way, besides the example that I previously gave.  I like to think that when I speak to people, I do my best to be conscious of their feelings and say something that might help them in some way.  Unfortunately, I don’t believe my friends cared enough to inquire about my random pauses in conversation (when I blocked an outgoing insult), so I never explained to my friends, or family, what I was working on that day.

            For the most part I worked extremely hard to follow the requested parameters of this exercise by speaking to people truthfully and kindly.  The only exception I can think of is when my friend, who had been sad lately, asked to hang out.  I really wasn’t in the mood to see him but telling him that would have just disappointed him more than he already was.  So, I ended up telling him that I was busy running errands with my Mom, which is always a golden excuse.  As well as some good laughs, this assignment helped me realize that your words to others can drastically change how they go about their days.  So when speaking with friends, family, or even strangers, don’t throw meaningless words their way in an effort to escape a social interaction.

iExamen 2

iExamen 2

                  

              Coming from a conservative American little island, the language we used was something important because it separated you from “uneducated” people vs “educate” people. My parents had made sure that I get three conditions in my communication kindness, usefully and the truth. If I look at my childhood, I can remember some slaps in the mouth and long punishments for saying some "white" lies or saying things that were not kind and even today at almost 20 years I still getting some small punishments and some serious faces. These conditions have become part of me and now there are no longer conditions, there are filters. Filters that I have been developed in a way that I can activate and deactivate them to improve my communication and change my behavior with different people. 

              On Saturday when I woke up in my home I was ready to analyze every word that left my mouth. Beside my days at the university where when I get up everyone still asleep and I have no one to talk to; at home, everyone was waiting for me in the kitchen ready to talk about their days. So, with a “Good morning!” I started this day. The conversations flowed non-stop. The themes changed both in subject and maturity. At one point we were talking about some documentaries that we had seen about Egypt and in the next second, we were talking about how sick my sister's doll was and how she had been cured by receiving the hair of a unicorn as medicine. The conversations remained as deep and as childish as you could imagine.

               Over the day I noticed that even if I used the filters in the same "way" I noticed some new filters as I spoke with my parents and my sisters. When I spoke to my sisters, filters were trying to simplify my thoughts, and blocking any word or sentence that can suggest that Santa Claus and unicorns not exist. While I was talking to my parents I was looking for more complex words and deleting every "misspelling words" because “misspelling words can’t be said under any circumstances”. For me was interesting, because I wasn’t conscious about how many filters I am able to use in a short period of time. They had become an automatic process. 

                Using and analyzing my filters before speaking wasn't really difficult or out of the norm for me. Actually, I enjoyed it, because being understood it’s something that although we do not give any value, now that I found myself in the situation of speaking a foreign language and not being understood as I wanted, it has taught me its importance. So talking in my native language and being able to be really understood without any type of misunderstood was as a weight took off my back and something that I learned to appreciated the most.

iExamen 2

            When saying what true and useful, it generally isn’t the kindest of things. The useful things that people want to hear aren’t kind since it is a critique about them or the fashion in which they operate, but the assessments made are almost always true.  When saying something kind about someone you may find yourself saying it for the sole purpose of being kind, not because you wanted to say something true or useful about that person. For instance, if your telling someone with a new BMW sports care that they have a nice car, you are stating something that is kind and true, but is it really useful? The owner of the vehicle is already aware he purchased a nice car, for he probably would not have made that expensive decision, it not useful to tell him that, it is simply a kind gesture. Before beginning this exercise I had doubts on whether or not I would be able to successfully adhere to the guidelines, I am a person who doesn’t like to say much unless I feel it is needed, and that generally means it is a useful bit of information I will interject, but whether or not it is kind remains a different story.

            This current pandemic surrounding the world has caused drastic changes to what we all presumed would be our spring semester and it changed my original plans for this assignment. When I am not at school, I generally spend most of my time at the liquor store where I work, and this is where I decided to practice the exercise for this assignment. When I first woke up in the morning my younger brother who I share a bedroom with was playing a video on his phone at a high volume; I normally would have said something along the lines of “Shut the F up your being loud”, but that would not have worked for this exercise. In my dreary and tired state, I could not think of anything to say that would meet the criteria of the kind, useful, and true nature; so, I just got up and began to get ready for my workday. My normal comment would have been useful and true, but it wouldn’t have been the kindest thing to say to someone the first thing in the morning when you wake up. Looking back saying something like “Can you please lower the volume its kind of loud and I’m trying to sleep” would have made sense, but not being a morning person and all, I couldn’t muster together that sentence at the time.

            At the store the relationship you have with a customer various, some come in to get their bottle and are out in minutes without little dialogue being exchanged, but some sty around and chat for a bit while they shop. My first interaction with a customer that day besides my standard phrase when they enter the store went as follows. The customer was someone who came buy almost every day, so she was someone who I consider having a good business to customer relationship with so I decided to engage in this exercise with her. When she first came to the counter with her item, I told her “Thank you for all of the business you have given us, and I appreciate you always being nice to me”. This is something I would have never said it if it wasn’t for this assignment, but I felt a slight feeling of goodness inside when saying it because it was something that was truly kind useful and true. This customer has known me for quite a while now and jokingly said: “Who put you up to say that”. She knew that was something that I normally would not have said to her or any customer for that matter on a normal day, but today was different. After I explained the reasoning behind my comments, she was very appreciative of what I had said and we both laughed it off and mutually agreed that doing an exercise like this every once and while would be something that could be of great benefit to all forms of communities. Saying things like this to someone every day would take away from its significance, hearing it out of the blue and catching you off guard puts you in a position to truly appreciate what had been said to you. Every day when a customer walks in I ask “Hi, how are you today” as a formality, me asking this almost every time takes away from its significance, asking every day takes away from the kindness of truly being curious about how someone’s day went, but rather only stands to initiate the business transaction that is to follow. Throughout my shift, I replicated this process with a various number customer who I shared a similar relationship, and each time I said generally the same thing as before and each time the person seemed to me, genuinely happy to hear it since it was something they hear often when going about their day. 

            Through practicing this exercise, I realized that it is pretty difficult to only say what is kind, useful, and true at all times. I found myself saying fewer things to customers and my family the day I practiced this exercise because in my experience saying things that meet all three criteria are not normally used in day to day conversation, but rather when truly wanting to show appreciation for something or someone. I similarly told my family how much I appreciate them using the criteria and they showed great admiration as well. My brother was skeptical however and asked about the true nature of my comment which I explained, and we again both agreed that saying things like that from time to time is greatly beneficial. Telling someone you appreciate them every day is incredibly redundant and taking away from its real significance, so I’m going to wait a while before I show my appreciation in this form again.

iExamen 2

IExamen 2

            Communicate with only what is kind, useful, and true, that was the assignment. I was very unsure about the outcome of this assignment. Would I communicate differently then usual? Would people notice a change in what I had to say? I looked at this as a challenge for myself, to see what could happen if I became more aware of what I said throughout my day. 

            On a normal day to day basis, I try and keep my words kind and make sure what I say is the truth only. However, during my self-evaluation I noticed how difficult this can be sometimes. As much as I try to keep what I say kind, useful, and true, some things that are said everyday don’t fall into any of those categories. Whether it’s picking on my brother or just communicating about what is happening in the world, not everything that is said is always in a positive manner. I would not say that this day of self-evaluation was extremely different then how I usually communicate, but I will say it made me more conscious of what I was saying. 

            It was quite an interesting experience to think about my words everyday — my brother found it funny when everything that was said was in a kinder manner then usual. I think it’s an excellent life lesson to think before you speak, and to think about the tone in which you speak. With that being said, I do believe that evaluating everything that I said to make sure it was kind, useful, and true can hinder the ability to communicate. By constantly second guessing what you say to make sure it fits in the categories, sometimes you lose the ability to communicate with your initial intentions. 

            This iExamen, I believe, was harder then the first one. This one took more thinking as to if what I was saying was appropriate, and I certainly had more self-realizations with this project as well. I was very unsure about the project going in, I didn’t know what I was going to learn coming out of it. The outcome of the project was more then I could have imagined, and I didn’t just realize my form of communication, but I had a realization as to how the world communicates with one another as well. Kind, useful, and true: it sounds very easy, but it’s much more difficult then one would expect. 

iExamen 2

For me, this assignment couldn’t have been given at a better time. For the last few weeks, I had made a plan to travel back home on Saturday to have a crucial conversation with a friend who would be on their spring break at the time. The conversation was not one I was looking forward to because over the past few weeks; I had received some concerning phone calls from my friend. These conversations told me that she was surrounding herself with not so supportive friends at her college, and I was concerned that they were begging to affect her mental health. 

             Walking into this conversation, I knew that it was vital that I thought before I spoke. I needed to voice my concern in a way that would not be attacking but instead come from a place of love. I knew it was going to be a challenge for me because I usually am someone who speaks their mind. This typically results in mean saying a lot of things that don’t often all connect. This then leads to people taking what I said the wrong way. Luckily for me, I would have this assignment in the back of my head to make sure everything I would say to her was kind, useful, and true.

              I won’t go into detail about what was said in the conversation, but I will tell how thinking before I spoke helped her and me in that situation. For me, it helped me to remain calm. I remember thinking the whole time that I just wanted to tell her to make new friends and to make better choices. However, as much as I wanted to do this, I knew this would make her feel attacked witch would lead to her getting angry. I knew that if she got upset, she would miss the point that I was concerned about her mental health. So, I made sure I was very careful with everything I said, and I made sure I was guiding her towards the right paths to get help. All in all, the conversation went well, and the assignment helped me tremendously.

Leaving the conversation that day, I can honestly say I felt good. This was surprising because I didn’t think I was going to be feeling good after having a serious conversation. However, I know this assignment deserves all the credit for my feel good. This is because leaving; I knew that I had said everything I wanted to say in the nicest, most accurate, and most useful way that I could. I left not feeling guilty about anything I said or having a pit in my stomach, wondering if I should have said anything else. This assignment made me feel confident not only with what I said but also how I carried my thought through the conversation.

             After that experience, I have learned that thinking about what we say and making sure we are positive without words can have huge effects. It not only makes other people feel good because we are kind towards them, but it also made us feel good. There were so many ways that the conversation I had that day could have gone wrong. I could have lost my patients. She could have taken what I said the wrong way. It could have led to problems with our friendship. However, because i was smart about what I said and because I made sure I was kind with the words I used. She was then able here my concerns without feeling attacked. All in all, I am so grateful that this assignment made me think before I spoke because it tuned a scary situation that could have ended badly to a situation with a happy ending.

iExamen 2

This assignment was particualarly easy this time around because everyone is home due to COVID-19. I chose to do this assignment on Saturday because my family was home. I slept in that morning until about noon and decided to go downstairs to grab something to eat. The first "interaction" I had that day was with my two dogs. They were waiting outside my bedroom door, probably concerned that I had not been up earlier like everyone else. The first human interaction I had that day was with my mother who was in the kitchen. We said good morning and talked about our plans for the day. I was fighting a cold so my mother didn't want me to leave my house that day. The thought of being stuck in my house with my family all day alarmed me because sometimes they drive me crazy. My sister was the next person I had interacted with. Her school had sent her home for the semester, so she and I discussed what our plans were for the next few weeks. 

            A little while later, my dad came inside from being outside all morning and told us how beautiful it was outside and how we should spend some time out there that day. We all thought it was a great idea. My mom decided that it would be nice to have a barbecue outside for lunch, so that's what we did. For about 2 hours we all sat outside and enjoyed each other's company. It was the first day that we had all been together since January.

         After lunch I decided to walk my two dogs around my neighborhood. A lot of my neighbors were outside because it was so beautiful. I stopped and talked to them along the walk. It was nice because I haven't talked to some of them in a while, and I was able to meet some new neighbors who had moved in while I was at school. 

         When I got back to my house I decided to call my grandmother to check on her and see how she was doing. My grandmother lives about five minutes away from my house and usually comes over every day to hang out with us for a little bit. She wasn't coming because she is trying to stay healthy and not leave her house. It made me sad that this was going to be the new normal for the coming weeks, but I was thankful to talk with her for a little bit. 

         I really enjoyed doing this iExamen. It was a great way for me to realize that if I want to survive the next few weeks at home, I can't be like a hermit in my room and I need to interact and spend time with my family and try to get outside as much as possible. 

iExamen 2

Cordy Albanese

Dr. Ellis

ENG-101

18 March 2020

iExamen 2 

  As I began my day I noticed the first person I interacted with in person was my mother, she offered to make me breakfast and I was very grateful and surprised to see her this morning because she is usually at work. With the ongoing virus pandemic, I have been self-quarantining as a way to protect myself and others from potential risks. This means that the only people I had a face to face contact with during the day are my parents and older brother. The pandemic has put a lot of things into perspective for me, I have noticed how fragile life is and that not being able to see my friends and extended family can be very hard. After breakfast, I started working on some homework and was texting my best friend Katie. We were talking about plans for the future when we will finally be able to see each other and go out and do things. We talked about how we take things like physical contact for granted and we have never realized it until it was taken away from us. We are grateful for the use of technology and being able to keep in touch during this crazy time. I noticed we just appreciated each other more and sent lots of heart emojis to show we care about one another and that life can be so short. I recognized we were both a lot more heartfelt than usual because of this fragile time. Throughout the day I checked on my extended family over the phone such as my Mom-Mom and Pop-Pop. We talked about future plans and how much we loved each other because we knew it was important to say that during such a scary time. I worry about them a lot as they are more at risk to the virus than I am and appreciated our conversation because they are still here to have one. As much negativity as this virus has caused, one good thing to come of it is the realization that I take the little things for granted such as seeing my mom or sleepovers with my best friend. As I went through my day I started to miss the awkward elevator rides at school with strangers because although the interaction may be small at least there is some sort of human interaction at all. This iExamen has helped me recognize my daily thoughts and how different they were from before the virus. I enjoy being able to take time to see my habits and change the bad ones and this has helped me to do that. Since I have done an iExamen 1 before this I had more understanding of what to expect and was excited to see the change between the two. Communicating via text or phone calls can be hard when the person is so close, but you cannot see them, so I hope to be able to see my friends and family soon and recognize the time spent with them as high importance.

iExamen 2

Megan Cronin 

When this assignment was first introduced, I thought that this was going to be easy. I have always thought that I tell the truth and say and send nice messages. I didn’t think that anyone would notice a difference and I thought that it would be like any other day. I was wrong. It took me probably twice as long to formulate what I was trying to say. I wanted to make sure that every word I said would be taken the way I meant it and that it would not come across as sarcastic. I found myself laughing at times because it felt ridiculous that it was taking me a long time to form a simple sentence. Communicating with my family was a little difficult because my family is very sarcastic, our responses to each other are not always kind or true. There were times where I had to stop and correct myself. Constructing my text messages was even worse. Text messages sometimes can come off in a different way than what you intended. I had to take the time to explain my point of view to make sure that the person understood and so that my message did not come off as passive aggressive. Being away from school means that I am texting more people, because I am communicating with all the friends that live in other places. We would be having a text conversation, but it would take me much longer to respond to their messages than it would take them to respond to mine. One of my friends even asked why it was taking me so long and I had to explain this to them. She found it interesting and commented that I had done a good job so far. From this I have learned that I am not always as kind or as truthful as I had previously thought. This is definitely something that I want to continue to work on because it is important. This assignment made me stop and think before something comes out of my mouth or onto a screen. We were taught as kids to think before you speak, but like many others I needed a refresher.