For me, this assignment couldn’t have been given at a better time. For the last few weeks, I had made a plan to travel back home on Saturday to have a crucial conversation with a friend who would be on their spring break at the time. The conversation was not one I was looking forward to because over the past few weeks; I had received some concerning phone calls from my friend. These conversations told me that she was surrounding herself with not so supportive friends at her college, and I was concerned that they were begging to affect her mental health.
Walking into this conversation, I knew that it was vital that I thought before I spoke. I needed to voice my concern in a way that would not be attacking but instead come from a place of love. I knew it was going to be a challenge for me because I usually am someone who speaks their mind. This typically results in mean saying a lot of things that don’t often all connect. This then leads to people taking what I said the wrong way. Luckily for me, I would have this assignment in the back of my head to make sure everything I would say to her was kind, useful, and true.
I won’t go into detail about what was said in the conversation, but I will tell how thinking before I spoke helped her and me in that situation. For me, it helped me to remain calm. I remember thinking the whole time that I just wanted to tell her to make new friends and to make better choices. However, as much as I wanted to do this, I knew this would make her feel attacked witch would lead to her getting angry. I knew that if she got upset, she would miss the point that I was concerned about her mental health. So, I made sure I was very careful with everything I said, and I made sure I was guiding her towards the right paths to get help. All in all, the conversation went well, and the assignment helped me tremendously.
Leaving the conversation that day, I can honestly say I felt good. This was surprising because I didn’t think I was going to be feeling good after having a serious conversation. However, I know this assignment deserves all the credit for my feel good. This is because leaving; I knew that I had said everything I wanted to say in the nicest, most accurate, and most useful way that I could. I left not feeling guilty about anything I said or having a pit in my stomach, wondering if I should have said anything else. This assignment made me feel confident not only with what I said but also how I carried my thought through the conversation.
After that experience, I have learned that thinking about what we say and making sure we are positive without words can have huge effects. It not only makes other people feel good because we are kind towards them, but it also made us feel good. There were so many ways that the conversation I had that day could have gone wrong. I could have lost my patients. She could have taken what I said the wrong way. It could have led to problems with our friendship. However, because i was smart about what I said and because I made sure I was kind with the words I used. She was then able here my concerns without feeling attacked. All in all, I am so grateful that this assignment made me think before I spoke because it tuned a scary situation that could have ended badly to a situation with a happy ending.
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